The illustrious return
I'm finally back from vacation
Before I went on vacation I thought to myself, “I totally will have time to write my newsletter while enjoying Italy.” As it turns out, I decided to enjoy Italy rather than write my newsletter. Shocking. Mostly, I just didn’t have any wifi so all I could do is sit and stare at my useless computer.
Thankfully, we are back and so is this newsletter. I’ve decided to keep the bits and pieces I wrote while on vacation in this so I apologize if some of it is a little old. Despite a busy week for me personally, with my move 800 miles away, expect a return to regularly scheduled reading.
From June 16th
Good morning everyone from beautiful Rome, Italy, where I’ve interrupted my vacation to type words for you to read. Why am I doing this, no idea, but if nothing else I couldn’t possible go a week without insulting Niraj Antani. Don’t worry readers, Niraj is getting slammed once again today. As is tradition.
Valedictorian Niraj
Niraj may have been valedictorian of his class, or he may not have been, I really have no idea. Nor do I care, because he probably wasn’t.
What I can tell you is he lost a race for Ohio State student body president a few years ago, which isn’t news-worthy it’s just hilarious. I think his loss there has greatly contributed to his desire to be the worst state legislator possible.
Another nugget we learned about him this week is that he reads my newsletter. Now, I have no idea if this is really true, but he is pushing legislation written off of what I explicitly said is dumb right here. As a general rule of thumb, if something is dumb you can bet that he has legislation pushing it.
I’ll give him one thing, he is at least prolific. Sitting every day in his office plotting the most obscure and worthless legislation possible isn’t a task for everyone. This week his eminences brilliant idea is mandating valedictorians.
Niraj, a pro school-choice advocate, isn’t content with letting public schools make their own decisions. So, he’s pushing legislation to mandate that public schools name valedictorians. This is super important to a guy like Niraj who doesn’t have kids or any stake in the game.
Ok I lied, the real reason behind this is that he’s trying to make as many headlines possible for his state senate campaign. The media eats up stuff like this and every headline about it he sees as another win for him. Am I contributing to this, sure, but I’ll give myself a pass because I can.
There’s no less than 10 articles I’ve found written about this, which is remarkable. The very tough process to get a bill introduced is literally:
Call up the Legislative Service Commission
Meet with them and tell them what you want
They write the bill
You give it to the clerks office
I don't need to say why this bill is dumb and a massive legislative overstep, I’ve said it before, but I’d encourage everyone reading this to consider that once again Niraj is a dumbass.
From today
Vaccination station
The Columbus Dispatch, a once noble newspaper, has clearly fallen on hard times. It was purchased by private-equity and went through some big recent layoffs. This is unfortunate, we need a locally owned watch-dog newspaper willing to do tough reporting into big issues that remain in our city and state. Unfortunately, the Dispatch has gone down the wrong path.
Today’s Dispatch front page is graced with the article, “Vaccines in crosshairs,” focusing on how a group of Facebook moms met in the statehouse to whine about vaccine laws. They were graced by the presence of Robert Kennedy Jr., whose only noteworthy feature is his last name. Seriously, can any of you even describe what he looks like?
To be serious for a second, this article was dangerous and stupid. It presents vaccination as a two-sided issue that is engaged in a roiling debate. In actuality, anyone who knows anything knows that vaccines are not only safe but save children’s lives.
A common issue in reporting is writing on issues with both sides of the issues. This can at times, of course, be important but when it’s about something as basic as vaccination there is no both-sides and no debate.
One side is pro-child killing and one side is anti-child killing, there’s a pretty clear cut case about what should be covered here. Having a Facebook rally of batshit supporters does not warrant news coverage, especially when it seems mostly just to get their organizations name out there.
Being the responsible citizen I am, I emailed the Dispatch editor to tell him this. His response was asking me if I’d read the article.
Local journalism is clearly in the dumps, outside of courageous newsletters like mine dedicated to making fun of a particular state legislator.
Miami Heat (Part 1)
That was my trivia team’s name last night, and also the Democratic debate. I’ve been looking forward to it literally since it was announced, who doesn’t love a good debate. But, that was quite possible the worst thing I’ve ever watched. The fact that Tulsi Gabbard came out of it in the tops of Google trends searches is pretty telling here.
For anyone who couldn’t tell, Tusli is complete utter garbage. She’s a Assad-apologist who literally took a trip to Syria to meet with the guy. Please, please, please don’t even think about supporting her she is not worth it.
I’m sure most of you reading this watched it and formed your own opinions, but if Liz Warren isn’t growing on you have a rewatch. She looked like the only competent one in the room, and when compared to notable idiots Bill de Blasio and John Delaney they aren’t worthy of even worthy of being mentioned in passing.
Can’t wait for tonight where self-help guru Marianne Williamson gets to grace our TV screens due to the super-lax debate qualification rules.
Trivia and more
Due to the amount of content out there, and having to sit through 3 hours of an air-bag replacement there will be another brilliant newsletter coming out tomorrow. The fact that several of you asked when the next one was getting published makes me question your reading choices, but is also touching.
Trivia last night was rough, with a rare 3rd-place finish. I did correctly name the NBA’s 6th man of the year, and the band who played Hang on Sloopy. Yippee.
Tonight DistrictPourhouse on campus 8-10 PM.
See you tomorrow, and have a good debate part-2 night.
Also, from this Jew, they’re concentration camps.